The past week has been one of the longest in my life!
So much happened.
Basically, we evacuated through flames, escaping our city with 88,000 others and heading south down the one highway in and out of town. We spent a night at a lake south of the city, with a large group, in a nice house. The next morning we considered staying there, but decided to join the mass of people heading further south to Edmonton, which is a major city. Thank god, as the lake we were at evacuated later that night.
Through crazy driving, gas line ups, driving the wrong way on the highway and gridlock we made it to Edmonton. And have since come south to Calgary.
Since then I have been up and down. One day I cried and stomped my feet and wanted to go home.
The news have been scary. Looking at the flames burn parts of the city was horrifying. Watching the firemen hold back “the beast” was amazing. Every day brought more worry. And more relief as we saw picture of our house still standing.
On Saturday I found a yoga class and went. I cried and cried.
A lovely studio in calgary yogadotcalm has given me free access to their Mysore practice this week. I am learning more about ashtanga. It is awesome. Physically and emotionally I am shaky and anxious and sweaty, but each day is a bit better.
From my practice I have been able to reconnect with my inner stillness and peace. I remember that this moment truly is all that matters. I let go of the fear that I am carrying since the evacuation. I stop obsessing over what will happen tomorrow or next week. I relax in what is.
I wish I could have zen and peace all the time. That I wasn’t shaken and shattered by things around me. But that wouldn’t be healthy. I still want it, though.
Sobriety is my foundation. Numbing is not an option. Instead I am going through this experience. I have asked for mental health support. I am taking it easy. I am eating.
Life is going on. We are finding a new normal day by day. And when we return I will be part of the rebuilding of my beautiful city.
Thank you for all the love and support. It has saved me.
Stillness and peace