My trip with my family was great. Five Finger Death Punch was awesome. They have become far and away my favourite band. It seems so bizarre, as they are so much harder than my usual yoga ish music. But it brings back memories of big hair and guitars from my teen years. Lol
One thing I worried about in sobriety was that I would never dance again. I admit, I am not the most coordinated person in the world. Yoga has given me a new appreciation for my body, and perhaps a deeper awareness as to where it is and what it is doing. But yoga class and dancing in public are not the same.
How wrong I was. I moved and danced and sang along. I shook my hair and wished I could play guitar.
I think back and I realize even drinking I was always painfully self conscious about how I looked. How was my body? Was my stomach in? Was I smiling? Was I standing right? On and on these thoughts plagues me.
Anxiety is a mean and demanding companion.
I don’t have this anymore. I rarely even think about how I look, my facial expression, my body. I am relaxed. My thoughts are much softer.
So dancing was easy. I just went with the music. I let the beat move me. It was relieving and fun.
It’s small things like this that illustrate how life changed in a way I was scared about, that I really thought would be a loss, but turned out to be such an improvement.
Take that step.
Stillness and peace