In the years before I quit drinking I tried to create the perfect
Life. I ate according to rules. I exercised. I volunteered. And I drank and drank and drank even though I wanted to quit.
One of the biggest changes this time was that in the first few months of sobriety I let go of my rules of life. I ate sugar again. I found gentle yoga. I took time off work to cry when I was just too freaked out to face people. I gave in to self care and stopped trying to be so good it hurt.
So, please, read this. And forget the diets, quitting smoking, sugar and or pop cleanses. At least for the first 5 years. Lol
Do you know the poem? It’s by Mary Oliver, who is one of those rare contemporary poets popular with both the literati and more casual readers. If you’re not sure, click the link above and read it, and then come back. I’ll be here.
<makes sandwich, puts clothes in dryer>
Oh hey, that was fast! Nice to see you again. So, it’s a beautiful poem, right? But for the newly sober, I sometimes imagine a version that’s…edited. Edited to one line:
You do not have to be good.
I’ve been thinking about this as I read the blogs of very newly sober people. Some of you are so ambitious! You’re getting sober and quitting smoking, or getting sober and quitting sugar, or getting sober and dieting. And it worries me. I get worried because I know the getting-sober part is hard enough on its own, without piling another task…
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