I read this quote and immediately thought-yes. This is it.
For a long time I rebelled against the idea that I couldn’t drink. I was sure it was just a matter of rules and willpower. That I could figure it out and continue to enjoy (lol) my booze. Because I was not going to give in to the thought that I had to abstain completely.
But, of course, I eventually did. I decided to take a year off drinking. To prove I could.
On the day I quit alcohol I was also diagnosed with celiac disease. Finally, an explanation for the odd, annoying health issues I had. So, without too much drama, I cut gluten out of my diet. My overall health improved markedly. Eczema that has plagued me my entire life cleared up. Headaches, brain fog, stomach pain, swelling.
Of course, I also quit drinking at this time, but it was apparent to me that many of the physical symptoms I had associated with drinking too much were actually gluten related.
I didn’t spend much time in self pity for the cupcakes and bread I could no longer eat. Sometimes I looked for alternatives, but I accept that life is better gluten free, and I stick to it.
Eventually it dawned on me that I could look at alcohol the same way. Drinking had obviously been contributing to my anxiety and depression. It was making my skin look bad. It was poisoning me. And I decided to put alcohol in the same category as gluten.
It is not for me. It does something to me that makes me crave more, to drown myself in oblivion and stupor. And to do it again and again.
Accepting this has made it so much easier. I no longer wallow in the self pity that I can’t enjoy a wine tasting or do shots of tequila. I don’t look at others drinking wistfully.
Instead I look at the possibilities a sober life has opened up for me. Yoga, reiki, new friends, peace of mind, comfort in my own skin. Joy. Open eyes. Feeling.
Why cling to a handicap like addiction when the game of life has some many opportunities?
Stillness and peace