I did an exciting new thing this weekend. I trained to be a level one reiki practitioner.
For anyone unfamiliar with reiki, it is a form of energy healing. The idea is that we are all made of energy. And sometimes that energy gets blocked in our body, or stagnates. And so a reiki practitioner acts as a channel between the energy of the universe and our bodies, helping bring balance back whereverbit is needed.
Anyway – Saturday I showed up at reiki training. There were 13 of us. We did some class work, and then it was on to hands on practice. Learning by doing.
As a practitioner – you open yourself up to the energy and let it flow through you into the client. You do not use your own personal energy – or you are quickly depleted.
In my usual perfectionist way – I didn’t heed that advice and put all my thought and energy into the client. It was hard. I was hot and sweaty and focused. My anxiety was out of control. In hindsight it was like trying to light a fire with your mind. All day.
By the end of the session I was tired, mentally drained and shaky. I wondered if perhaps I was too sensitive for reiki practice. Too much touching. Too much sharing of energy between people.
I went home and sat on the couch. I had a hot bath. I dwelled on what I perceived as my own deficiencies. Everyone else has seemed to find the process energizing and balancing. I definitely did not. Maybe this wasn’t for me.
I wasn’t prepared to give up on this just yet, so I read more of the information we had been provided with. I love information, and I am forever reading. As I gained a better understanding of the reiki process, a though came to me… If I am just channeling energy from the universe – I don’t need to do anything. I need to let it happen. I am getting in the way by trying too harder. I needed to try smarter.
So the next day I went in with a different perspective. I spent more time on balancing myself before. I wore my beautiful mala that brings me personal peace and comfort. I relaxed and opened myself to the energy of nature and just let it flow.
I felt full of energy and light. The day flew by. I went home and had so much focus and joy all evening. I even gave reiki to my son who had a headache and he perked up and felt better.
Wow. Here is was. An real example of how my own efforts didn’t help me. A new (old) lesson. Trying to control the universe is tiring. Go with the flow and see what wondrous things might occur.
Stillness and peace