Movie Thoughts

I watched a movie on the weekend. I won’t tell you which one, as many of you will probably see it.
There was a scene in the movie where the mother character cries, saying her life has been a series of events – weddings, births, birthdays, graduations. And now that her oldest child was grown up all she had to look forward to was her funeral. She wondered – is this all there is??? Isn’t there more??
Opposing this is her son – out in the desert, enjoying the beauty of nature (and a hash brownie), hit with the epiphany that the moments choose you.
I don’t buy into either of these perspectives. My own journey has brought to me the realization that it is NOT the big moments – the births, the weddings, the glorious sunrise on an isolated peak – that matter. It is the constant small moments. The sleeping child. The fresh cup of coffee. The kind cashier at the grocery store who smiles at you and makes the day a little brighter. Those are what life is about. That is where happiness lies. We just need to be aware enough to see them.

Sobriety has brought these moments into sight for me. If I wait for BIG MOMENTS, I am missing all the time in between.

Stillness and Peace

Anne

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39 thoughts on “Movie Thoughts

  1. That is so true. I find that I also appreciate the small moments more than I did – maybe because I’m not suffering through them with a hangover and self-loathing. And not wishing the hours away until I can start drinking.

    Have a wonderful day!

  2. I absolutely and truly believe this. When I’m drinking, I don’t enjoy those moments as much. But, when I’m not, like now, I am enjoying the calm, the laughs with my kids, the dinners- cooking them for the kids and I, sitting down with them, talking with them while they eat…and even if they scarf down their meal lately and go back to what that are doing, I feel happy. For nourishing their body and for the time I took to watch them and enjoy them. I don’t even mind doing the dishes after! All part of the routine:)
    Oh, and I stand in a particular line at the grocery store, even if it’s longer, so that I can talk to a wonderful lady that bags my groceries. She’s like an angel and calls me honey. I love that, and I tell her:)
    Thanks Anne, xo

  3. Well said, Anne. Totally true for me too. I now notice those little moments so much more- they are so much more enjoyable sober. I think the more we allow ourselves to relax into our life and be in the moment- the more we can appreciate the simple pleasures. xo

  4. I saw that movie and was also struck by that scene. how sad it seemed that she measured out her life from one milestone to the next…. I may have been super-sensitive but I thought alcohol was a pretty strong theme throughout the film, too.

    when we weight down the smallest moments with our full attention, we can truly capture time in a way that otherwise slips through our fingers while we are waiting for the ‘big event’. enjoying the best of every day now – your post being one such! xx

    1. Wow. Me too. Aside from all the alcoholic husbands, who were clear problems, there was drinking in almost every scene. Excessive drinking. My husband and I noticed it – I think they MUST have been making a commentary on the prevalence of booze in our society. And none of it was good, except perhaps the kid at the end, but his being high really ruined any “deep insights” he might have has. And he was WHINEY!!!!!!!

      I was really sad for the mom too. I wanted to shake her and say – look at all you have and all you could still do. I really believed for a while that my life was over when I had kids and that only they mattered. That I would sacrifice any thoughts of happiness as long as they were happy. I am still trying to figure out why I thought that, but I don’t any more. What a horrible thought and no way to raise kids.

      Powerful movie though.

  5. Dear Anne,
    Isn’t that the truth?
    This helped me today, as I keep thinking I need BIG THINGS to happen, and then life slips away!
    Thank you!

  6. I have been trying to explain, or figure out, exactly what it is for me. This is IT! I feel the exact same way. It’s almost like every little thing is a gift in some way. Thank you for posting this ☺️

    1. I completely agree. For the first few months of sobriety some of these moments were so profound I almost cried. I thought they would fade as it became more “normal”. They haven’t. If anything, I feel them more often.

  7. Beautifully said Anne. I wish I hadn’t wasted so much of my life on booze. I feel like I’ve list so much precious time. I can only concentrate on the here and now and make the most of every day. A x

    1. No time wasted, just lessons learned that help you now. I have had to put that remorse aside. We can’t go back, so it is best to not try.

      When we enjoy and embrace today they don’t matter anymore.

    1. Thank you. I love blogging as it gives me a place to “talk” about these things. That is a big bonus of sobriety. Being able to voice my inner thoughts and feelings without fear.

  8. I have been amazed at how I now notice the small things. I think I am just more patient, not rushing through everything so much. Thanks for making me think about this, Anne. Annie x

  9. I couldn’t agree more. Those calendars full of things to do is life happening. Once I sobered up, I could see that. All the little moments are part of a larger story.

    Thank you for sharing this!

  10. God is in the details they say. He is in the little things as much as the large. The little things more so, I feel and this is why – it takes more appreciation and openness to be aware of the little things. That smile, that coffee, that laugh. When I am more connected to Creator, I see the things He does in the tiny manners. When I am more aware of that, I feel that I am more in tune with nature and the swirls of synchronicity. I sense more. Gratitude lies in the little things as much as the big stuff. The big stuf is great for movies, but I will take the little things any day.

    Lovely, lovely post.

    Paul

  11. I read this earlier in the week from work, on my lunch break, and I’ve been trying to find the time all week to reply and tell you how much I love this post Anne. In recovery, I am so much more aware of the little things than I ever was before. I feel so blessed by my recovery, and so blessed to be in such awesome company ❤

  12. I liked the movie, Watched it last night. But I do agree with you. There are simple pleasures too, the value of which which I might’ve ignored had I not been sober.

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